Is Perfectionism Harmful to Health? How to Control It?

Perfectionism can harm health through chronic stress, anxiety, and physical symptoms. The pursuit of unrealistically high standards leads to negative self-talk and fear of failure. To control perfectionism, redefine success, practice self-acceptance, set realistic goals, celebrate small wins, and consider therapeutic approaches when needed.

3/14/20255 min read

a woman sitting at a desk with a cup of coffee
a woman sitting at a desk with a cup of coffee

Is Perfectionism Harmful to Health? How to Control It?

Introduction

Perfectionism - a trait often viewed as an advantage on CVs and during job interviews. Striving for excellence, meticulousness, and high-quality work are qualities desired by employers and admired by others. But where is the line between healthy pursuit of excellence and obsessive perfectionism that can lead to serious health consequences? In this article, we'll take a closer look at how perfectionism affects our mental and physical health, and present effective strategies for controlling perfectionistic tendencies.

What is perfectionism really?

Perfectionism is more than just a tendency toward accuracy or attention to detail. It's a multidimensional personality trait characterized by setting extremely high standards for oneself while simultaneously tending to be overly critical of one's own actions. Perfectionists often perceive even the smallest mistakes as failures and have difficulty accepting what they consider average results.

Psychologists distinguish several types of perfectionism:

  • Self-oriented perfectionism - setting unrealistic requirements for oneself and harsh self-evaluation

  • Other-oriented perfectionism - expecting perfection from people around you

  • Socially prescribed perfectionism - believing that others expect perfection from us

It should be emphasized that not every pursuit of high standards is harmful. The key difference between healthy striving for excellence and toxic perfectionism lies in the approach to mistakes and failures, and in the emotions accompanying task completion.

Perfectionism and stress - a dangerous relationship

One of the most direct effects of perfectionism is chronic stress. Research shows that perfectionists experience significantly higher levels of stress than people with a more balanced approach to their achievements. This happens for several reasons:

Constant internal pressure

Perfectionists live under constant pressure that they impose on themselves. Their inner critic rarely falls silent, continuously evaluating and comparing results to idealized standards. This constant pressure leads to elevated levels of cortisol - the stress hormone - which in the long term can lead to exhaustion of the nervous system.

Fear of failure

For perfectionists, every situation becomes a potential threat to their self-esteem. The fear of making a mistake can be so paralyzing that it leads to procrastination or complete avoidance of challenges. Paradoxically, people striving for perfection often achieve less than they could because the fear of imperfection prevents them from taking action.

Toxic beliefs fueling stress

At the core of perfectionism often lie deeply rooted, toxic beliefs:

  • "My worth depends on my achievements"

  • "If I don't do something perfectly, it means failure"

  • "People will only respect me if I'm perfect"

These beliefs create an uninterrupted cycle of stress, anxiety, and feelings of inadequacy.

Health consequences of perfectionism

The impact of perfectionism on health is well documented in scientific literature and extends far beyond occasional feelings of tension or anxiety.

Impact on mental health

Perfectionism is strongly linked to many mental disorders:

  • Depression - constant feeling of not meeting one's own standards can lead to low mood and depression

  • Anxiety disorders - excessive worry about making mistakes triggers anxiety mechanisms

  • Obsessive-compulsive disorders - perfectionism often co-occurs with OCD

  • Burnout - constant pursuit of the ideal leads to emotional exhaustion

Impact on physical health

Chronic stress associated with perfectionism also translates into physical health:

  • Sleep disorders and insomnia

  • Reduced immune system function

  • Gastrointestinal problems and irritable bowel syndrome

  • Headaches and tension muscle pain

  • Increased risk of cardiovascular diseases

Emotions and the pressure of perfectionism

The emotional cost of perfectionism is enormous. Perfectionists often experience:

  • Chronic guilt

  • Shame related to perceived imperfections

  • Frustration and anger toward themselves

  • Envy toward people who seem to achieve more with less effort

These emotions, constantly experienced, create a toxic internal environment that over time can lead to serious health problems.

How to recognize toxic perfectionism?

The boundary between healthy pursuit of excellence and toxic perfectionism can be unclear. Here are key warning signs that may indicate a problem:

  1. All or nothing - tendency to view results as either completely successful or completely unsuccessful, without gradation

  2. Procrastination - paradoxical postponement resulting from fear of imperfect execution

  3. Excessive self-criticism - internal dialogue full of accusations and criticism

  4. Difficulties with delegation - belief that only you can perform a task well enough

  5. Obsessive checking - repeatedly verifying completed work

  6. Difficulty enjoying success - immediately moving on to the next challenges without celebrating achievements

How to build a healthy approach to life instead of perfectionism?

Controlling perfectionistic tendencies is a process requiring time and consistency. Here are effective strategies that can help build a healthier approach to life:

1. Redefining success and failure

A key step is moving away from black-and-white thinking. Instead of viewing results in terms of success or failure, try introducing an evaluation scale. Was the completed task good enough for its purpose? Did it serve its intended function? This approach allows you to see value in actions that may not be perfect but are good enough.

2. Practicing self-acceptance

Self-acceptance doesn't mean giving up on growth, but recognizing your worth regardless of achievements. Practice internal dialogue full of kindness and understanding, the same as you would offer to a close person in a difficult situation.

3. Setting realistic goals

Instead of striving for perfection, set goals that are ambitious but realistic. The SMART technique (Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, Time-bound) can be particularly helpful in formulating healthy goals.

4. Celebrating small victories

Perfectionists tend to overlook their achievements and focus exclusively on what needs improvement. Introduce a routine of celebrating small victories - keep a success journal or take a moment each day to appreciate what you've managed to achieve.

5. Practicing mindfulness and emotion acceptance

Mindfulness techniques can help in recognizing perfectionistic thoughts without automatically accepting them as true. The practice of accepting emotions, including difficult ones associated with feelings of imperfection, helps reduce their destructive impact.

Therapeutic approach to controlling perfectionism

In the case of deeply rooted perfectionism, professional help may prove necessary. Several therapeutic approaches show particular effectiveness:

Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT)

CBT helps identify and transform maladaptive thinking patterns typical of perfectionism. CBT therapists help patients question irrational beliefs and replace them with more balanced ones.

Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT)

ACT teaches acceptance of difficult thoughts and feelings instead of fighting them, while encouraging actions aligned with personal values rather than perfectionistic standards.

Mindfulness training

Mindfulness-based programs, such as Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction (MBSR), teach recognizing perfectionistic tendencies without judging and automatically reacting to them.

Perfectionism in the era of social media

In today's world of constant exposure to carefully selected images of other people's lives, perfectionism has gained new fuel. Social media creates the illusion that other people lead perfect lives, which can intensify perfectionistic tendencies. Awareness of this mechanism and a critical approach to content in social media is an important element in controlling perfectionism.

Summary

Perfectionism, although often perceived as a positive trait, can have a destructive impact on our mental and physical health. Chronic stress, toxic beliefs, and impossible standards create an internal environment full of tension and anxiety.

Controlling perfectionism is not about giving up high standards, but introducing greater flexibility, self-acceptance, and a balanced approach to success and failure. By redefining success, practicing self-acceptance, and developing mindfulness, we can transform toxic perfectionism into a healthy pursuit of excellence that supports our health and well-being instead of harming it.

Remember that the journey from perfectionism to a healthier approach to life is a process requiring time and patience. So be patient and kind to yourself on this path - it's the first step to freeing yourself from the tyranny of perfectionism.